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I’m dating my best friend’s ex and she won’t speak if you ask me

A lady seems bad about her relationship along with her friend’s old partner. Mariella Frostrup states she needn’t – and may concentrate on restoring her friendship

‘I’m happy I’ve met such an excellent individual but I’m finding it very difficult to maneuver on from harming my pal.’ Photograph: Alamy

‘I’m happy I’ve met such an excellent individual but I’m finding it very difficult to go on from harming my buddy.’ Photograph: Alamy

Final modified on Thu 23 Nov 2017 11.11 GMT

The dilemma I’m dating this guy that is amazing. The thing is he could be my friend’s ex that is best. She and I also had been heart sisters, talked from the phone all day, had sleepovers on a regular basis. She had been my stone. She began to date this person and four months we started to see each other after they broke up. She had not been impressed at all, and I also don’t blame her. She cut our friendship off immediately and, the maximum amount of it very hard to move on from hurting her as I respect her decision, I’m finding. But I’m additionally happy I’ve met such a great individual. It’s just starting to come between me personally and my partner because We can’t forgive myself. Also, we knew a great deal about their relationship. I’d love some suggestions about simple tips to move ahead with this situation.

Mariella replies proceed, or backpedal a little? I'm sure the global world we reside in now is in line with the concept of forward momentum – eyes to your fore, places set on future goals and possibilities. Our company is aware of something that tries to buffet us backwards. Nonetheless it’s not really feasible to help keep going relentlessly up, up and away.

To extend the metaphor, it may feel just like you’re scaling Everest in flip-flops, shorts and without air. Too much concentrate on remote and elusive peaks, and it may get pretty messy in your course.